Album of the Year

The album of the year is being declared early by me and anyone who has listened to the Fratellis' Costello Music, which just totally blows the doors off of anything else that even could be conceived of as the album of the year for 2007. In fact, CM puts to shame nearly every album of the year there has ever been throughout the history of albums and years. Every godamn song on this cd spanks yer ass until you are begging for it to please lay off yer ass for a while. But it won't. So yer ass is basically a bloody mess by the time track 13 ends, and now you have to see an ass plastic surgeon or something. Also, this is the only album that I can recall that suggests the possibility that gangbangs can just be fun rather than savage or sinful. Luckily, though, for family friendly listeners, the word "gangbangs" is never mentioned. In fact, I believe there's only one bad word on the whole disc. It comes early in the first song ("Henrietta"--maybe also the best song), when the Fratlellis refer to themselves jovially as "these three miserable cunts." Apparently, the boyz wanna get with some chick named Henrietta, so they make a few direct and helpful suggestions as to how the relationship might progress:

"Clean out the bank
Bump off yer daddy
You can come live with us
Amongst the has-beens and the addicts"

And those, my friends, are the best lyrics on an album that hath only one flaw: most of the other lyrics aren't that memorable. In fact, unless you read the lyric sheet, you prolly won't understand most of what the hell lead singer Jon Fratelli is going on about, cuz the pace is generally frantic and crack-addicted. But fuck it--the tunes are just so kick-ass jam packed with energy and aural joy that you won't care much what they mean. Oh, and this is bar none the best album ever if yer a miserable cunt like me who walks an hour a day and needs some high octane shit to keep a body with a badly damaged ass lurching around the track...