Sunday, January 27, 2008

Rambo Balboa

"Goddamn illegal immigrants!"

That's the movie we need to see next: Rambo and Rocky meet in the old folks home, and they become such good pals that Rocky name's the kid he has with a twenty year old nurse after Rambo. Then you cut to 16 or 17 years later, and you've got a kid who can box like a motherfucker and kill people in 80 different ways--shipped off to Iran to fight the leading heavyweight jihadist and kill everyone else in the country! Aw yeah. Those fucking striking writers better watch out, cuz the txb-scab is ready to go to work. Anyhoo, saw "Rambo" with G. Gonna review it on my T.V. show. Surprisingly, it wuz actually pretty good if all yer lookin' for is decent characters, a decent story, and pure carnage. It's funny when someone axes me whether "No Country For Old Men" is really violent, b/c compared to movies like "Rambo" it looks as if the Coens have filmed a skirmish at Vacation Bible School. I'm sure I'm not blowing anything for anyone when I mention that John Rambo is alive and well at the end of the film and ready to make more sequels. He has also returned to America, after apparently years of exile overseas. Thinking back to "First Blood," I said to Gary after the movie, "Geez, I hope he doesn't get pulled over by a cop," and G. replied, "Yeah...I can just picture it: 'Looks like you've got a piece of intestine hanging off your machete there, John. I'm afraid we're gonna have to take you in for questioning.'"


Blogger dan said...

Is that Toby Keith in front of Rambo in the pix ? Put a boot in your ass and then out through your mouth, that's the Rambo way.

1:48 PM  

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