Monday, March 08, 2010

Random Thoughts on the Oscar Suckfest

Hurt Locker? Meh. Completely predictable jokes from Baldwin and Martin. Just let them get drunk beforehand next time and totally riff the whole night...cuz that couldn't be worse than the canned snappy patter bullshit. Also....we get it, Neil Harris: yer gay. You don't need to do a song and dance number on every single fucking awards show to prove it to us. And what the flying fuck wuz up with having all those costars sing the praises of every best actress nominee? I fell asleep...did they do the same think for the best actor nominees? Their comments were longer than most thank you speeches! And why the fuck wuz Oprah up there? Miley Cyrus and Amanda Seyfried were hot. Katie Bigelow gave a lameass "I'm just in awe of my fellow directors and their huge cocks" rambleathon...doesn't she know a writer or two that could help her compose a coherent acceptance speech? Nice to see the washed up John Hughes punk actors, I guess. Hey, Macaulay Culkin isn't dead. Who knew? In the end, Jimmy Kimmel kicked all of Hollywood's ass with a hilarious afterparty show. Seriously, Academy...get fucking JK to write your shit next year, cuz Bruce Vilanch's jokes are only slightly funnier than the In Memoriam portion of the show.


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