Ass to Mouth

The ambassador of Bassenheim lost his bassoon after falling back & assward into a very large largemouth bass with Asperger's.

Say My Namor!

Prince Namor gets hooked on heroin and becomes a real fuckup. The new monthly series is called The Subpar Sub-Mariner. It's cancelled after a year and relaunched a month later. Now Namor has kicked the junk but he doesn't wanna be a hero anymore so he gets a job as a minimum wage sandwich-maker in the existential series The Subway Sub-Mariner. It's cancelled after four issues and relaunched a month later. This time the ex-prince is striving to inspire today's youth by occasionally filling in at his local high school. Get ready for the inspirational series The Sub-Mariner Sub. Halfway thru the first issue there's an announcement that the series has been cancelled and that it will be relaunched next month. Blank pages follow.

"I'll fuck your shit up for this, Boehme."

Fire Sauce Walk With Me

I'd like to nominate for a Nobel Prize the courageous and visionary Taco Bell drive thru worker who put eighteen hot sauce packets in my bag last nite.

Riding Bareback

"This was a bad idea. It's tough to gallop with a boner."