Monday, June 28, 2010

Boehme's Buns

No, this is not a report on my ass. This is an assessment of the sugar conent for hamburger buns in America and McDonald's in particular. A diabetic colleague of mine recently claimed that McDonald's shoves a bunch of sugar into their food--their buns in particular--so me and Elliot Davis kicked in some doors and shoved microphones in people's faces and here is the report:

As with most things in life, size matters: sure, a Quarter Pounder With Cheese bun has 5 grams of sugar compared to the 3 of a plain old Wonder Bread bun. But the bun for a regular hamburger (i.e., a kid's burger) from McD, which is prolly about the same size as most store bought buns, is 4 grams of sugar. So yeah, I guess the put a little more sugar in, but not much. In fact, I bought some buns from Wal Mart as part of this bun review. I figured they were about the size of a QPWC bun...and they had 6 grams of sugar each!

Here's a website if you want more info (you click the questions, and some McD stooge gives the answers). One dude does mention his blood sugar going up big time after eating McD food...

Of course, most nondiabetics (and their blood sugars) would prolly be fine with the occasional McD meal if they would just order the fucking Diet Coke!

Saturday, June 26, 2010

gerry fills a hole

gerry road his jet pack to the ho-metown buffet
to meet dan ho & his entire family for dinner,
but no sooner had they beheld the buffet than
gerry laid waste to it with sum magic mojo.

first he cast a pall of shaving cream
over the macaroni & beans & steak
& over the taco bar & everything else;
then he sprinkled wheat grass on the mess.

next he pricked his finger & blessed the buffet
with eighteen drops of his own blood.
finally, gerry uttered a spell in sanskrit
& the buffet became a magic energy ball

which flew away to plug the oil leak in the gulf
& cleanse the ocean and all its life;
of course, dan ho & his entire family were
pissed that they didn't get to eat.

Saturday, June 19, 2010

Reasons to either get married to it- or not- these photos are related in some way

Tuesday, June 15, 2010


It's one of those word salad-sounding headlines that leads to an awesome story. I'm guessing the explanation from Chrisitians will be that humanity is sinning so much that God has to do ever more horrible things to Jesus...

Friday, June 11, 2010

Yeah, I Know...Plato Already Said This Shit

Thought fer the day: we are like the Next Generation Star Trek peeps, except we live our lives perpetually in the holodeck. We've lived here so long that we've forgotten there's a world outside--forgotten that we're even in a holodeck. So all the dire things that seem to happen in the holodeck we take as real life even tho' the safety protocols are always on and nothing can truly damage the real us. If we could remember that we're just playing various little roles, enacting various programs, but that none of it's real and none of it can hurt us...well, maybe we could be more at ease, have fun like the holodeck wuz meant for...or maybe we could stop the program and just dwell in the peace of whatever world exists beyond all of our imagined scenarios. Make if fucking so, Number One! (BTW, this analogy would sound a lot better if there hadn't been a couple of episodes where some alien took over the holodeck and really did make it deadly-dangerous on TNG and other Star Trek shows).

Thursday, June 10, 2010


For anyone who might want to know- and that would include the people who read this blog- I refuse to pay these idiots 4 dollars per month- for nothing. It also seems that even if you threaten them with not paying four dollars per month- for nothing- then they will slow down your internet speed- to nothing- when you try to connect to them. This might mean that they will in turn slow down the internet speed ON EVERYTHING ELSE THAT MIGHT BE CONNECTED TO THEM. So I am done. I hope that I can continue to post fun things to this blog.

Wednesday, June 02, 2010

New at McD's: The Triple Baby Big Mac!

Damn, McGuire's wife had three kids. He must have even shot her in the ass with steroids.

Maybe he's a hitting coach by day and an experimental chemist by night... and now we at last have clear evidence that the dildo/steroid injector works! (of course, Mac knows this will shake the foundations of Christianity since he has shone how the immaculate conception could have happened thru anal penetration).