Black Swoon

Black Swan isn't so much a character study as a nervous breakdown--taking place over what appears to be weeks or months in the life of a ballerina named Nina Sayers (Natalie Portman). That can't possibly be for everyone, and I heard some groans from the oldsters when the credits went up at Plaza Frontenac. I'm surprised they made it that long, what with the lesbian and masturbation scenes (which were, by the way, awesome). I dunno...maybe they were just pissed about the ending, which may be flawed but is one of those things that seems to make sense if you ponder it for a while afterwards. Anyway, the movie kicks ass, and if NP doesn't get an Oscar Nom for Best Actress, then the Academy Awards can suck it. A word of warning, tho': you'd better file down your nails like Nina does compulsively or you'll be biting them throughout the film. This is freak deaky stuff, kids...and it ain't pleasant.

Something for the Maintenance Man

I noticed there was a smear of ketchup on a nearby table
just before I shot my old man in his one good eye.